What I've Learned in Malabo

As I'm reaching the final third of my journey here in Equatorial Guinea, I ( some of my housemates too) composed a list of some of the things I have learned in Malabo... Definitely not a complete list

What I have learned in Malabo:

Traffic signals are optional
Puddles are more dangerous than you think
If you want to receive Communion, cover your shoulders
Having water or power is a perk
It isn’t unusual to hang out with Scotsman during the week
Getting called blanco is normal
It’s perfectly acceptable to call an albino kid ‘fake white’ as a term of endearment
If you didn’t almost get hit by a car, you aren’t walking across the street
Oil compounds are a little slice of suburbia
BBQs make up most of your dietary requirements
Directions get creative because of the lack of street signs
You need a guard to open the gate
There is more than one way to get into your house
If you aren’t squeezing into a car meant for half the people going into it, you’re missing someone
Going to a primary school for 3 hours a week can be the highlight of the entire week
It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand Mass, Church is Church
Every white guy is John McCain
It is normal to be congratulated on your new President by random people and nuns
Children love to be in pictures
Taking pictures can become a covert operation
Military check points are optional if you are in a car
Hanging out at the pool is normal in November
If you are in trouble, call Sally
Being tanner than your friends in other places abroad is something to take pride in
You can go outside your house and pick mangos off a tree
Don’t get sick
People will use any excuse to get together and eat
Being a ‘monkey girl’ is the best way to identify yourself
You don’t need a prescription to get more malaria meds
You need more bug spray in your house than you do in the jungle
Hormigas no son nuestros amigos
Hearing a squeak means that Bina has seen a bug
It’s normal to see lizards everywhere
Your UNGE ID is more important than your passport
No one is named Amanda, so my new name is Imelda
Kids here are cuter than American kids

TBC……